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Man-Up and Kick The Football, Charlie Brown

December 18, 2012

In reading this post and drafting a response, I happened upon this scene which is constant in the Peanuts comic franchise, this comment reminding me of it. It’s ultimately another man-up rant to join the countless others, but this illustration is so good it’s worth exploring.

So, I’ll hold the football, and you come running and kick it…

This is actually a pretty good illustration of what’s going on in the state of marriage as it exists today. The Peanuts comic has this scene, which repeats itself, where Lucy holds a football for Charlie Brown to place kick. He always points out that Lucy never manages to actually HOLD the football for him, but she always manufactures some excuse that she will hold it THIS TIME. She always manages to pull the football away as Charlie Brown reaches the ball, making him fall flat on his ass and she gets her jollies that she fooled him again.

It’s a perfect illustration of the fallacy many are operating under, and it’s something I’ve dealt with a couple of times here already. Most others have too, and there already hasn’t been anything said in the comments to that post that I wouldn’t have already said in directly responding to this.

In the comic illustration, Charlie Brown is the leader by kicking the football and moving it, while Lucy is the help-meet in her role of holding the football. He can attempt to kick the football repeatedly, but if Lucy doesn’t hold it there and instead pulls it away, he will fall flat on his ass every time. It is a great illustration of what is going on in the modern society. Men seem to instinctively know this, but women seem to not get this:

A lot of the men in the manosphere apparently expect a ready-made woman who will just submit to them and not be a bother. Their idea of a ‘submissive woman’ is sort of like a robot, or a pet rock, as one (male) commentator noted recently. Their complaints show that they don’t accept or understand the nature of women. Outside the manosphere there are more men than you might think who are essentially looking for a mother – someone to run the show and make their lives easy. Scoff all you like, but I’ve seen it too much to believe that it isn’t just a small minority of men who are like that.

If you expect women to shape up, I’m afraid the larger burden is on men to shape up and lead. A woman is not a leader. This is biblical, so if you don’t like it, take it up with God, not me.

I have already addressed the fallacy in the second paragraph, but it seems, given the nature of women, that it can be easy for the women to read the manosphere and believe what is in the first paragraph by what a lot of us write. The first paragraph is totally incorrect.

What we want is rather a woman that will be trustworthy and honest about her intentions to submit and actually show herself capable of submission. What we want is a woman that will actually hold the football there so we can kick it. What we want is rock-solid assurances that the woman will be held to account for pulling the football away as much as men are held to account for not trying to place kick the football. We’re tired of trying and falling flat on our asses. Falling on your ass hurts A LOT.

It’s no surprise men have stopped trying to kick the football entirely, as most all men have a lot more sense than Charlie Brown does. Women will notice that men aren’t trying more than they’ll notice the results of them pulling the football away. Where are the wrongs in the case, as it relates to the repeated Charlie Brown scene?

1. Lucy makes Charlie Brown think that she is going to submit by holding the football for him to place-kick. She fails in submission, not only failing to hold the football in place but pulls the football away.
2. Charlie Brown for falling for the stories that Lucy is actually going to hold the football this time and trying to place-kick the ball anyway. Believing the rationalizations and falling for the stories the women and their proctors are putting out is the biggest danger facing men at the moment.

Women complain about men never kicking the football, and in fact are refusing to submit until the man proves that he’s going to kick the football and can kick it like an NFL pro:

Nevertheless, it is true that a man has to show himself worthy of submitting to and that we women cannot submit to a marshmallow. Once we have deemed him trustworthy, we can relax and submission is much easier, even when it is difficult, so to speak.

To make it simple: When women start womaning-up by showing (not saying) their willingness to submit and actually hold the football there and are receiving consequences for pulling it away, then we can talk about men manning-up and kicking the football. Real manhood is not willingly submitting to a woman pulling the football away and being the butt of her laughter for it. Justice THEN reconciliation.

It took Charlie Brown being turned invisible and kicking the ball when Lucy didn’t realize it for him to actually kick the football and see what he could do. This says something to our marriage situation as well. CL and other women can deride men about being Peter Pans who don’t want to grow up, or looking for another mother and not a wife all they want, but since a lot of these men have never gotten to actually kick the football, how will we ever know?

  1. Rock Throwing Peasant permalink

    I read that piece by CL and had the same impression. I’ve heard this tune before. Sure, it comes with a dash of “Woman Up!” But it’s definitely a “Man up” and provide resources, your God commands you!

    I really dove into this topic and a husband of a failed marriage. My final conclusion is to be a godly patriarch, but unless there is zero uncertainty about the woman, Go Your Own (Godly) Way. My nephews, my sons, etc will only get this message and it will be served with the bitter taste of Red Pill.

    CL is pulling a Lucy, because if you ever lise frame, well, who do you REALLY have to blame?

  2. Rock Throwing Peasant permalink

    Dang it. Posting from a phone and can’t proof well.

    “AS a husband of a failed marriage”

  3. Spot on. It does seem the women folk are mad that more and more men are taking their ball and going home. All the while shaming the men and calling them Peterpans.

    It would be so interesting to watch events transpire as a neutral observer. To hit that point of apathy that you can just sit on the sidelines and watch the comedy/drama unfold. I’m pretty much at that point but still working on the apathy.

  4. sunshinemary permalink

    This is brilliant.

  5. deti permalink


  6. I have just commented there and I am going to comment here.
    The problem is that people want us to be worthy of submission when none of us are worthy.
    Men, you need to love your wife because Christ commands you to.
    Women, you need to obey your husband because Christ commands you to.

    And yes, we are imperfect, we get it wrong, we vary fromdespair and withdrawal to uxoriousness (any woman reading… if you oppress your man he will probably retreat into a mancave of some sort. This is a sign something is wrong, so change what you are doing).

    Leadership comes from the structure of marriage given in scriptures. You do not have to like it, but other ways of living kill marriages. This is no different from other situations — at work the senior is the leader, the heirarchy is explicit, and leadership comes with the position.

    Now if our society does not see that, does not matter. Humans have not changed, and we need not beleive the lies promoted by the elite, for their own selfish ends.

  7. Anonymous Reader permalink

    The Charlie Brown / Lucy / football example sums up a lot of relationships between men and women. There is an entire cottage industry among the churches that teaches men to “slow warm” or “pre heat” their wives all day, or for days on end, if they really want to have sex. And yet, this cottage industry never teaches women to turn on their own piiot light. Women have the option to refuse at any time, for any or no reason. They can indeed hold out the football of sex, and yank it away at the very last second, then whine that Charlie Brown doesn’t try hard enough to kick that ol’ football.

    Ditto success in college. Ditto success in business – it’s ludicrous for entitled snowflakes to demand a 6 figure income from a man before they will look at him, when they themselves are holding the job that man likely would have done well in.

  8. “I demand you show me hospitality!”

    Most women don’t realize how often they break the magic they wish to invoke when they open their mouths.

  9. I don’t get it…

  10. Chris wrote:

    The problem is that people want us to be worthy of submission when none of us are worthy.
    Men, you need to love your wife because Christ commands you to.
    Women, you need to obey your husband because Christ commands you to.

    I thought on this analogy some more after I wrote this post in this manner. Being “worthy of submission” is what a lot of the women are going for, but they expect perfection. They expect a fallible man to never let them down in any circumstance. They expect their own personal Jesus in the flesh. To apply the analogy, women expect men right out of the gate to hit the football 60 yards into a crosswind and make the field goal every time without fail. This is unrealistic, as any field goal kicker will always miss at least once or twice at any distance. It’s also unrealistic for the man to expect the woman to get the football and hold it perfectly every time. But most men are capable of realizing this. In fact, men and women are both failed creatures that will fail in these measures at one time or another if they are tried honestly.

    The problem comes in willful disobedience. While I know there are husbands out there who willfully choose to not love their wives, there are legions more women who are willfully choosing to not submit to their husbands. This comes home in the analogy by Lucy, who is willfully pulling the football away at the last moment to cause Charlie Brown to fail.

    Lucy (after pulling the football away): “I don’t trust you that you can actually kick the football, Charlie Brown. You need to man-up and actually kick the football.”

  11. Husbands do not have to earn submission, which is why Scripture commands us to give it even when the husband is disobedient to the Word.

    Wives don’t deserve love, which is why husbands are commanded to love as Christ loves, and no love doesn’t mean “be nice and take her crap without correcting her.”

    I have found that keeping my eyes on my own paper is more than enough to keep me occupied.

  12. Cautiously Pessimistic permalink

    My own particular Lucy/Charlie Brown dance has shortened itself to a simple two-step.
    Her: You need to take a leadership role in our relationship!
    Him: Cut up your credit cards.
    Her: …
    *rinse, repeat*

    It may be an unhealthy relationship, but at least it doesn’t take much effort anymore. Used to be I’d actually run for a bit until I found this shortcut.

    I’ll let you know when the divorce proceedings start (or when I find out about them, anyway). :/

  13. deti permalink

    “Being “worthy of submission” is what a lot of the women are going for, but they expect perfection. They expect a fallible man to never let them down in any circumstance. They expect their own personal Jesus in the flesh.”

    Ballista has hit on the problem here. Modern day churchian “theologians” acknowledge the “submission” commandment, but read into the text all sorts of conditions on it.

    She does not have to submit to anything less than a perfect husband who leads her perfectly (read: leads her the way she thinks she should be led or leads her the way she wants to be led).

    Or he has to “earn” that submission.

    Or he has to be “worthy” of that submission as judged solely by her or a pastor.

    Or he has to FIRST love her as Christ loved the church, BEFORE she is required to submit.

    Or he has to show he is “submitted to Christ” FIRST; and the quality and character of that submission is judged solely by the wife or a pastor.

  14. Thank you, Ballista and Elspeth. I like both of your replies.

  15. Retrenched permalink

    There was an episode of Charlie Brown in which the Peanuts gang formed a football team. Charlie Brown had to make a field goal at a critical moment in the game and… well you know what happens.

    And of course the whole team puts all the blame on him for missing the kick, and no blame whatsoever on Lucy for pulling the damn ball away. As a kid I always thought that was grossly unfair.

    What a fitting metaphor for the collapse of marriage in the west. Women withdraw their love and commitment, and men are blamed for it. Men line up to kick the ball, women pull it away.

    And women wonder why men don’t want to suit up and play anymore..

  16. Deti has posted some superb stuff as well (per usual). Copied here from the original link, since it was sort of a response to something here:

    Translating the metaphor:

    We want women who are what they represent themselves to be; and who do what they say they are going to do.

    We want women who are honest and up front about what they want in a relationship and a marriage.

    We want women who offer more than their vaginas and are interested in something more intellectually challenging than “Keeping up with the Kardashians”.

    We want women who are willing and able to submit to a man’s leadership.

    We want women who are willing and able to step into the role of helpmate.

    We want women who keep their promises and honor their commitments.

    We want women who don’t bail when the going gets tough.

    We want women who are not complete bitches.

    We want women who are willing to be as accountable for the responsibilities a marriage puts upon them as they expect men to be accountable for their respective responsibilities.

    We want women who are as willing to accept consequences for their failure to live up to their expectations as they expect men to accept the consequences for their respective failures.

    Deti writes here:

    Ballista has hit on the problem here. Modern day churchian “theologians” acknowledge the “submission” commandment, but read into the text all sorts of conditions on it.

    For example…

    Retrenched writes:

    There was an episode of Charlie Brown in which the Peanuts gang formed a football team. Charlie Brown had to make a field goal at a critical moment in the game and… well you know what happens.

    I didn’t research the examples of this much, but I happened upon the one I posted because of the paper. My creative writing isn’t that good, but that video can be scripted well with regards to marriage (that paper being the marriage license, pledge, or covenant).

    Thanks for mentioning this, though. My research indicates that it appears in “It’s Your First Kiss, Charlie Brown” and there’s a couple of quick videos on Youtube of it. (, ) The last one: “Chuck you can’t do anything right!” Perfect, relating to the current message men are getting regarding their wives and marriage.

Trackbacks & Pingbacks

  1. Fifty Shades of Frivolous Divorce | The Society of Phineas
  2. - Everyone’s into submission fantasies now. Feminists are annoyed, while Christians are predictably useless. | The Woman and the Dragon

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